Just Chatting!!

As you guys know, I am totally addicted to facebook. All day I keep on making new friends, and as usual a few days back, I added one more friend, Kesha Chakraborty. At first she was just an idle name in the fiend list, then I stated liking her status, she stated commenting on mine, and we became fiends…. And trust me; in facebook even a mere conversation is enough for me to befriend someone.

So one fine day were as usual talking, better say quarreling about rubbish things when she said me to check her status.
I did what she said.

It showed
Having a gr8 relief 1ce agn… da Bitch s bck… x)
I commented on it – You are the biggest bitch.

She didn’t comment back. Instead she sent something in my chat box. I checked it.
Kesha-You won’t understand, I can’t tolerate. Finally he said he wants to be my ‘Just Friend’
          Ha Ha…after so much drama, just friend? Disgusting
Me- Give it a damn. Btw is it Debapriyo?
Kesha- No no…I accepted Debapriyo because he persuaded a lot…
Me- That’s not good, loving someone else and committed with someone else??
Kesha- If a boy can do this to me then why can’t I Sameer?
            I hate male sex…
Me- If I follow your logic, then after what happened to me I should hate female sex, but I don’t because I believe exceptions are always there!!!
Kesha- You should hate female sex unless you find that real girl who comes and breaks it…
Me- I have found my real girl, though she is yet to find me…
Kesha- You’ll be hurt again this way…
Me- Doesn’t matter to me, I am used to it. Six months ago I was so happy, money, girls, party, masti…total life. But since then things have changed drastically…
Kesha- Now you tell me, which life was better?
            Wasting time behind her or having fun with money and girls?
           Who’s the loser?
Me- But whenever I go around with other girls, I feel guilty…I love her so much…
Kesha- You love her?
Me- Madly…
Kesha- Does she love you?
Me- I don’t know…She say’s she wants to stay single…I guess she doesn’t…
Kesha- She doesn’t, trust me…we give this answer to avoid men…
Me- I know she doesn’t
       But my question is ‘WHY?’
       What’s the bloody fucking problem with me?
Kesha- She may love someone else the same way you love her…
            Why do you men have the habit of thinking things about yourself only?
           She has her own reasons to leave you…
Me- She doesn’t love anyone, she said me…
       Just because I am a Bengali and she is a Marwadi…she can’t get committed…
Kesha- Awesome reason, she doesn’t live in dreams like you; she knows she can’t marry you… so why will she keep the relationship? Just to have sex? People will laugh at you, forget her. Move ahead, the other girls are waiting…
Me- I never said I won’t marry her…
Kesha- Trust me, but no none will accept it, neither your parents, nor her parents, anyway you can’t force her!
Me-Tell me one thing…can you ever forget him? Be honest…
Kesha- I have to, because he doesn’t love me…see, I definitely can’t forget him but I can’t stop living life for him…
Me- You’ll waste your life…
Kesha- He has wasted my life, now I’ll do the same with every guy…
            And I believe one day he’ll come back…
Me- That’s what keeps me going…
Kesha- Let us go to Haridwar and meditate may be they will return…listening our prayers! :-)
Me- I’ve a better option. Let’s get famous, and once we get famous they’ll be back…
Kesha- Hey, that’s a good idea, but how?
Me- That’s why I am writing blog!
Kesha- Good next time, take me with you too!!

It ended there. It ended on a sweet and humorous note, but contained some serious things to think about.
How can some one hate the opposite sex so much?
How can I love her so much?
Was Kesha right?
Am I really being a loser?
Is she taking the right decision by getting committed to someone she doesn’t love?
 Yes, I need to find the answers to these questions, but I don’t know how! Probably Kesha was right, I mean at least she is a lot matured than I thought, but then it’s just impossible for me to go around with some other girl. I am in a mess and only one girl can pull me out, please Nidhi please!!

That's It

I was turning the pages of my eco book. I was supposed to study about mobility of factors, after all just two weeks left for the boards. Somehow it was not working because my mind was stuck somewhere else. Yes, I was thinking about her, yet again.
‘Urghh, concentrate Suman!’ I scolded myself.
It didn’t work. I checked my cell phone. Then I decided to send her a message.
You can’t imagine Suman without?
Reply...i am waiting!!
Two minutes and came a reply…I can’t imagine you without your friends and so called attitude!
And after that I started a conversation….
Me: Me and attitude? Ha Ha Ha…Joke of the day:-D
She: No, you have a lot of attitude and ego, which has always let you down…
Me: Ya I know, I have attitude but I am working to put it down…
She: Thank God, you accepted it…
Me: Will accept anything you say, I don’t like rejecting others like you…
She: Oh…is it? :-0 hmm…I see!
Me: Btw do I have even 1% chance? I mean…is it like I am BOOM or I can try again?
She: Hey, please you are embarrassing me…btw I saw your photo with Vishaka…I really liked it…you were looking good…
Me: Thank you but answer me first…yes or no? This is the last time I am asking…
She: I want to stay single for now, can’t we stay friends?
Me: That’s it! From now on, you go your way, I’ll go mine…I know this way I’ll destroy my life, but if I stay with you, I’ll destroy your life as well! And I don’t want that…Bye
She: You know what? You are a good human being…and a nice guy, please keep contact…!
Me: Useless, I am deleting you from my contact list…but anytime in life you feel you love me too, just let me know…I’ll be there for you, doesn’t matter whether you are 20 or 70…I’ll wait!
She: Okay, if that gives you happiness, then do it…delete me from your contacts…I’ll miss you! :-(
  
     My hands reached my cell. But it was trembling. I felt a choke in my throat. Within moments, even before I could realize, puddles of tears surfaced from my eyes. I couldn’t see anything. Damn, I cried after five years, for a girl. I couldn’t believe it. I never knew I loved her so much. I rubbed my tears and replied to her…

Bye…I love you, and I’ll always do! Take care, I am already in tears, please don’t reply

Five minutes passed…no reply came! I decided to send her one more message…
This is my last good night wish, happy birthday in advance, take care…and one request to you, please think about it once more after the exams…good night, bye!
Her birthday is 25th march…I’ll never forget it.

Within minutes her reply came…

Happy birthday to you too in advance (23rd April)…I’ll always remember you…please mujhe ek bura sapna samajh ke bhuljana…

And then for the first time I said a wise line…something which even I never knew I could say…I replied her…

Pyaar koi bura sapna nahi hota…I don’t want to start again…please…bye
She: Bye, good night…I am sorry.
Me: Don’t be…and please remember my request!
She: Sure…
I didn’t reply back…I don’t know why I did this…it was never in my plan...I wanted to make the friendship stronger with her, and try again after a few days. But, I did something different; I broke the friendship with her.

She was right, true love doesn’t have a strategy or a game plan, I realized it. I don’t know whether I did right or wrong….but I did it, though i'll never give up!!